the routine -boredom!

I'm completely exhausted and was practically falling asleep at the espresso machine( don giv the kettle in my room ne rst!!) tonight . Getting up at 5:30 am., going to extra classes, and then RUSHING straight to college for a streched 8 hours isn't exactly what i call a fun day. Especially when after that i have yet to come home and start on my loads of submissions, diaries, writing, talking to the one I love, taking a shower, and saying hi to my parents.. if they're even still up by the time I settle. I don't talk to them much during the week...

I'm completely slipping away from reality. I sat in all my classes today, trying SOOOO HARD to pay attention, learn something, and feel like a student that I am... but before I knew it , class was over, and I had been zoned out the entire 45 minutes... hell, who knows if a teacher even called me??! Which is even worse, I wasn't even thinking about anything while I zoned out for every class period. It was like...not me. I have no idea what is going on.

I can only wear super flat shoes because I get so dizzy and sway these days. I hold literally onto railings, people, everything. I can hardly make it from one class to the next without falling flat on my face .

Even in my most tired states I can't fall asleep. It's like I never learned how...I just can't do it. My pulse just races, and my eyes droop, but I am completely alert and awake, just listening to the wind outside …